Desmond Gunatilake - An Appreciation by Kumar Gunawardene

The cold hand of death has laid its icy fingers on yet another of our colleagues. My sadness is profound  but I find solace in Khalil Gibran’s enduring words. ’For life and death are one, even as the river and sea are one’.

Desmond was one of the handful of Thomians in our year of ‘62; the others being Bora, Lareef, Sydney S, KDPR, Rajan R and  myself; also Uncle Bala who was half Royalist. To us he was CD; a Thomian trait whereby our companions were often alluded to by initials. Its probably a British public school tradition likely passed on by our founder Bishop Chapman who was an old Etonian. I was KRW to most of my classmates.

We restablished contact a few years ago following my discovery of his email address in one of our batch reunion souvenirs. After that we wrote to each other regularly. One of the most poignant exchanges was over his brother Geoffrey. He was a schoolmate who passed away at the age of fourteen. Death at such a tender age was a horrifying shock to all of us. We grieved silently with his close knit family. CD wrote that not a day passed without him thinking of his brother and could not get over his bewilderment why this happened so early in life to a near perfect human being. 

CD adjusted to the harshness of Medical School life quickly and was very helpful to me to find my feet.Fortunately the accident of our names made us sit close to each other at lectures.This was one exception to the alphabetical tyranny which separated us from our friends and those we wished to be close to.As ND has said CD was studious but also urbane and cultured  and endowed with a lively sense of humour.

We met most mornings in the red double decker buses, a legacy from the nationalised South western bus company.He would board in Mount Lavinia;some of us including Suri and Senarath would get in at Dehiwala and many more in Wellawatte (Chitta,Soma,Jayaratnam etc); a few girls amongst whom was Anna P would get in at Bambalapitiya.We had a great time usually in the upper deck chatting or simply gazing at the passing spectacle of those leisurely days ,dismissing  temporarily from our minds, the maelstrom we were heading to.

At the Eye Hospital junction we would disembark and walk to the faculty;a few brave souls like Bora would thumb a lift ,sometimes with hilarious outcomes;one day Professor Rajasuriya had stopped for him!!

CD faced the rag with equanimity our main inconvenience ,having to go to a cafe in Punchi Borella  for lunch,wearing a jacket back to front and also mismatched shoes. After that first tumultuous fortnight we would adjourn to the Canteen for lunch and sit together.Also at mid morning and mid afternoon for a cup of tea.I smoked  for about three months ,but CD never did.In and out of the bleak dissection  rooms and cold lecture theatres he was always ready to help with notes,advice and explanations.In the Common Room too he was a good companion;here the noisy animated chatter was the order of the day ,away from the billiard table and the carrom board.

At the end of the third year I joined Bloem;we thus drifted apart but only slightly.He sailed through all the examinations and we parted after graduation sadly never to meet again.He migrated to USA and I to UK and then Australia.But we always cherished “The memories and friendships fine and free ,we formed in the school of our boyhood ,the school by the sea. ”

In the USA he became an expert and skilled pulmonologist ;a respiratory physician as we call them in our part of the world.One of his patients has written;”I have been a patient of his for more than ten years.I guess where he stands out the most is that he is a good listener.To me this translates that he wants as much data about your situation and you personally,before he’ll recommend what to do.

He had thus become a complete physician in the tradition of Hippocrates,other great physicians down the ages and also our own revered teachers.Now Desmond too belongs to the ages.

An old Mexican dicho (proverb) says that there are three deaths.First when the soul leaves the body,next when the body is buried or cremated and lastly when one’s friends forget you.

We must forever be grateful to Lucky,Mahen and all the others who sustain the Blog for not only preserving the memories of our departed colleagues ,but also for bolstering the friendships of all of us.

Farewell dear Desmond .To live in the hearts we leave behind is not to die.

 May you Rest In Peace.May the good earth lie softly over you.

Kumar G