Sunday, May 22, 2022

Remembrance Day 2022

Remembrance Day 2022

Kumar Gunawardane

“The comfort of having a friend may be taken away, but not that of having had one”
Seneca

It’s a hard task, to follow the heartfelt tributes already paid to our departed colleagues; especially ND’s, Srianee’s and Rohini Ana’s and Mahen’s joint effort. Each year, the exercise becomes more and more poignant.

To my everlasting regret, I was close only to a few. But I bow my head to them all.

The first to leave us, and still the most grievous to me is Sunna. Our friendship matured during the exhilarating internship at Galle. He was, in the deathless words of the Bard, a friend who could be grappled to one’s soul with hoops of steel. A staunchly loyal companion for all seasons, he was generous to a fault to family and friends. One of my most treasured possessions is a collection of letters he wrote to me in his early days in USA. I gave the originals to his brother Manik, but kept photocopies for myself. I will refrain from detailing his generosities, as they would have embarrassed him in life.

Sue R was a transitory vision who like the new moon enveloped all around her in a warm glow.

Desmond G, my friend from the school by the sea, nursing a secret sorrow, but rising above it.

Tilak D an incurable romantic , bowled over again and again by fair maidens.

Chandrasiri, who helped Bora and me surmount the seemingly unconquerable hurdle
of the Surgical finals.

Kunasingham, of whom very little has been said, an outstanding hockey player in the National team, who never ever talked about it., let alone brag; with a constant bashful smile and a quirky sense of humour.

Razaque, HN, JG, Sidath, and Jaimon are each unique, each amusing each delightful in their own way.

They and the others made the days in Medical School a repository of treasured memories, we can fall back on with nostalgia.


“When you part from your friend, you grieve not; for that which you love  most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain”
Khalil Gibran

9 comments:

  1. Kumar
    Thank you for those memories of friends. Time will not erase those happy memories. They will be remembered.

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  2. Kumar, I enjoyed your snippets and of course your engaging style of presentation. Keep the Blog going!

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  3. Kumar, thank you for sharing your memories of the friends who were close to your heart. Like you, I do think of people like Sunna and Sue Ratnavale on and off. Some incident or a chance meeting with a common friend will trigger a memory. Friendship with Sue went back to LC days, but Sunna was someone who became a close friend when we were living in NYC at at same time. He also developed a friendship with my husband, who was a Peradeniya graduate. Sunna was a frequent visitor at our tiny NYC apartment. One of my fondest memories of Sunna was a few years later, when I got a phone call in the middle of a busy day during my residency at Norwalk Hospital in Connecticut. His deep voice at the other end of the phone announced that he was downstairs in the hospital gift shop/cafe! He was driving by on his way to Pittsfield, Massachusetts, and thought he would join me for a cup of coffee! Of course, I interrupted what I was doing and headed downstairs to join him. I remember visiting him in Pittsfield with my family, and that may have been the last time I saw him.

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  4. Kumar, I also meant to write that there were many modest, quiet people like Kunasingham, who kept such a low profile, that some of us never got to know them or anything about their accomplishments. That was our loss. Thank you for writing about Kunasingham.

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  5. deep affection. He sat next to me during Physiology lectures ( Karunaratna , Kunasingham ) He was indeed very shy , always gentle and soft spoken . I remember vividly how Dr Ratnavale got Kuna to walk with a stiff knee, and then add on a foot drop... clearly demonstrating the circumduction walk of hemiplegia.

    I remember Sue Ratnavale who was always charming and friendly. I remember singing in the SCM Choir at her Wedding at St Paul's Milagiriya Church.

    Priya ,Ganesh and Rangith Kuruppu were all very close friends who I had kept in touch with ....it's hard to believe that I can't pick up the phone and have a chat with them as I used to.
    Ranjith was so full of fun. I am sure most you can remember his " Dance of the Seven Veils" at one of our batch reunions. I had the privilege of helping him with the dressing ,putting on the wig and make up! With his fair complexion he did look very seductive !

    Russel and Dawn, HN, "Cigar" as we fondly called Sidath were also special to me. Incidentally Cigar was responsible for getting me thrown out of Thanaballs's Ward Class by making me grin watching his antics standing behind Thanaballs' chair.

    Priya was my partner in the girls Table Tennis Tournament . Being actively involved in organizing the batch reunions kept us in close touch. I was full of admiration for her courage at the way she faced her malignant which ultimately claimed her life. She was indeed an inspiration to us all .
    Russel was a a man in a million So gentle and unselfish . He would often stop his own studies to explain difficult subjects to any one who sought his help. Though he was brilliant he never showed off , or made you feel inadequate.

    Kamali another absolutely brilliant batch mate, with a quiet sense of humour
    Anna,another gentle and rather quiet friend, seen but not often heard, like Sardha who I regret I had lost touch with after graduation. Her tragic experience of loosing he young son due to an ICH made he a recluse.
    My dear friends we will always remember you with love and affection. To live in the heart of those who love you is to live forever!

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    Replies
    1. Kumar
      Lovely to hear from you after a long time.
      I enjoyed reading your snippets, thankyou.
      You mentioned Sardha. She who worked with me at the Homagama hospital after internship. She was good company and a friendly soul.
      Later I heard the sudden death of her only child a young son.
      I went for the funeral at Kelaniya. The cause of death was the rupture of an aneurysm.
      I lost touch with her but her sister used to consult me re her eyes and heard from her that she passed away. Such a sad ending.
      We have to console ourselves that this is life and that we are left with happy memories.
      Let them all rest in peace.
      Chira

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    2. Kumar
      Small correction. It was Suri who mentioned Sardha.
      Chira

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  6. Hi dear friends I stopped earlier as I thought I had gone on rather long , but feel compelled to add to my memories.

    Ganesh was such a special friend to me as indeed he was to many in the batch.
    I clearly remember Ganesh singing popular Sinhala songs lustily in the bus all the way to Habarana on our Ruby Anniversary in 2007.
    While all of us seem to age Ganesh looked eternally young with boyish good looks and endearing smile. It was so tragic that Ganesh who was a teatotalar should succumb to cryptogenic cirrhosis. I got to know his daughter Nishanthi very well when she worked at J pura. Hospital. In her I saw the same gentle qualities and utter dedication to the patients in her care due no doubt to the shining example of her father who she took as her role model.

    Seren lyer was another dear friend who I was so glad to meet after more than 4 decades . His sudden and unexpected demise left us all shaken I remember him dancing no stop at the batch reunion. I recall how he used to carry a photo of his sister Sita who died tragically from Ulcerative Colitis when a 3 rd year medical student in Pera in his wallet and show it to us saying it's his girl friend.

    Kamini G was another special friend . She was always so smart and pretty , always kind. I remember that in our 3rd year she lived in terror that her mother who had left Medical School after her 2 ND MBBS to get married would join our batch! I remember telling her that it would be so sweet and a record. We became even closer as we served as interns under EV Pieris. I was delighted when her daughter Rohini joined my daughter Manique to sing at the Doctor's Concert of the SL M A for three consecutive years. Their item being called " Doctors Daughters "
    I can go on but feel I had better call a halt. Hope you enjoy reading my snippets of some of our dear departed Batch Mates

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