Speedy Dialogues Series:
Episode
5. Pramilla Senanayake
“My views on the importance of
keeping in touch with batch mates and friends.”
Speedy: Good morning Pram. I
can’t say how pleased I was when you agreed to be my next guest.You made my
day! Pram, you have kept in touch with so many of our colleagues for over 50
years and have been an active participant in so many of our reunions. You never
fail to contact your colleagues on your visits to London and you also entertain
past and present colleagues at your wonderful “Pool Side Parties” at Hyde Park
Residencies. My question is this. How
have you managed to do this for so many years and what is the driving force
behind it?
Pram: First of all, thanks
for inviting me Speedy. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading the series. I don’t
know where you get these ideas from, but they have certainly helped to keep our
batch together. To answer your question, I am very much a people’s person. I
love to meet people, both old friends and make new ones.
Speedy: So it is part of your
natural make up to enjoy the company of people.
Pram: Very much so, and
wider the circle the better. I have friends from all walks of life. Teachers, doctors,
engineers, pastors, sportspersons (professional and amateur) etc. I do not
believe in barriers such as age, religious, ethnic or other limits to my group
of friends. I have friends who are in their teens and I have friends who are in
their 20s, 30s, 40s and even nineties! I have friends who are rich or very
rich but I also have dear friends who may find it very hard to make ends meet.
I firmly believe that friendship is about humanity and being kind to one
another and being there for them at their times of need. I think it was Thomas
Aquinas, the famous 13th Century Theologian and Philosopher who said
that “there is nothing in this Earth to
be prized more than true friendship”.
Speedy: I agree. That is a
wonderful quote Pram.
Pram: This has meant that
over the years, I have built up a vast number of friends from varied
backgrounds and I like to keep in touch with them as much as I can
Speedy: I can quite
appreciate that but how do you actually achieve it?
Pram: I do make a special
effort as it is important to me. I prefer face to face contact rather than by
email or by phone, although at times, I do need to resort to these methods of
course. But without doubt, my preference is to meet and greet friends face to
face.
Speedy: Pram, if you don’t
mind me saying so, you have contributed enormously in your own field both
nationally and internationally, and you have travelled widely. This is not the
place to go into it in any detail but tell me, has these stood in the way of
maintaining contact or have they on the contrary, helped you?
Pram: I was blessed to
have a job while based in the UK where I was traveling to all continents and
many countries. So whenever I travelled to a country, I made it a point to look
out in that country for friends from my Medical school days or from my school
days or even from my church groups. I then tried my best to contact these folk.
On every occasion, people were delighted to hear from me and often travelled
long distances within the country to even have a cup of tea with me.
Speedy: That does not surprise
me one bit Pram. Your joy in meeting old friends is very transparent and
genuine. I say that with absolute sincerity and I am sure your friends who had
that pleasure to receive a call or a message from you will vouch for that.
Pram: Very kind of you to
say that Speedy.
Speedy: No worries Pram, it is
not difficult to speak the truth! The other aspect I would like to discuss with
you are your famous “Poolside Parties” at Hyde Park residencies. Having
attended many, I am so impressed with the way you do it, with such style and
panache.
Pram: My goodness! Thank
you very much! I do enjoy entertaining. So whenever I can, I gather together
groups of friends, for example batch mates from my medical school days, I do
not hesitate to invite them home. I really enjoy the fellowship and bonds we
have. It is so wonderful to catch-up on what has happened
since we last met, to talk about family matters, professional matters and so
many other things. We learn so much about each other and from each other.
Speedy: Very very true. As you
know Pram, I too like to keep in touch and I am so grateful to Lucky who
started this Blog which has helped me personally to keep in touch and revive
old memories. What are your views on the Blog?
Pram:I think Lucky has done
a tremendous job connecting us together, which is for me so vital, so crucial!
I wish I had more time to contribute, but I do read it regularly. I salute
people like you Zita, ND, Indra and many others who keep the blog going.
Speedy: That is good to hear
Pram. I know that there are many like you who read it but don’t comment. That’s
fine so long as they are happy. It would, of course, be lovely if more
contribute articles. The offer I made to colleagues some time ago, to send me
anything they would like to post for formatting and editing is still there. I
would be delighted to do it.
Pram: I am sure the blog is
accessed by many and I hope your offer is accepted. Some of us are still
computer shy and also not too keen on writing articles!
Speedy: I don’t mean to be
critical in any way whatsoever, but some of our colleagues have chosen not to be
in touch. When I say that, I mean as a Batch, not as individuals which I am
sure they do. It is perfectly natural as
we walk this long life journey to join new people and have less contact with others
as our circumstances change. We change too, in so many ways and the features
which drew us together could change too. Change is universal and has to be
embraced. Have you got a message for those who I am sure for very valid reasons, have chosen not to be in touch, about the value of maintaining contact?
Pram: What can I say to
people who may not want to keep in touch - Well they don’t know what they are
missing!! Only 2 weeks ago, I had one of my poolside parties. There were at
least 2 people we had not met for over 50 years. How they enjoyed seeing the
bunch! They also said how much they wanted to keep in touch from now on.
Speedy: Wonderful! I saw
Lucky’s post on it and it was good to see so many batch mates. Apart from
others who came, I counted 14 people from our batch. It was nice to read Rajan
“Patas” Ratnesar’s comment: “Every time I
see these get-togethers I become nostalgic and wish I could have been there.
Nice to see their faces and be reassured that we are blessed with good health.
Time for another batch reunion”
Pram: Yes, there were a few
others from our senior batches as well. Patas has been to my parties and we
missed him, like so many others.
Speedy: Can you think of an
instance where you "bumped into" somebody quite unexpectedly that
made your day?
Pram: One incident comes to
mind. It was in New York. I was there on work and so was this friend from
London whom I had lost touch with for quite a while. We were both walking down
42nd Street in opposite directions when suddenly our eyes met. We instantly
recognised each other though we had not seen each other for years! We found
time for each other and chatted away over a coffee and caught up on all that
had happened in those lost years. We are now in regular contact.
Speedy: 42nd
Street, what a place to renew acquaintances! I have not seen the famous musical
of the same name myself. Your story on meeting a friend struck a chord in me.
Whenever I meet a colleague after a long gap, for a very short time you notice
a change and then time just melts away and we pick up from where we left.
Well Pram, I enjoyed our chat and
let me finish with a quotation by Orson Welles. “We're born alone, we live alone,
we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion
for the moment that we're not alone”
Pram: Thank you for adding
me to your Dialogue series. I would like to encourage others to join too and my
message is this - It really is easy as Speedy constructs
it stage by stage with the thoughts you post him by email. Go for it, you will
enjoy it!
It is now becoming a habit. I mean publishing a new post and rushing to add my own comment.
ReplyDeleteI am making this comment not as the Blog Administrator, but as a very close friend of Pram. While endorsing everything that she had said in this episode of Speedy Dialogues, I wish to emphasise that she has that special knack of selecting friends for permanent association. I was particularly impressed by her statement - "I have friends who are rich or very rich but I also have dear friends who may find it very hard to make ends meet". I can personally vouch for this. She moves so easily with these two ends of the spectrum of society.
I have no hesitation in naming her as one of those anchors who keep our batch together.
That was nice to read Lucky. She is most certainly one of our main anchors and it is a pleasure and a privilege to have her as a friend and batch mate.
DeleteDear,Pram,
ReplyDeleteYou are a beautiful,charming,considerate,intelectual.I was glad that,I had a chance to meet you at last years "get together",in,London.I noticed,little change in your stature.Continue with your good work for the humanity and entertaining your friends.
It’s great to see Pram in the hot seat. She has been a marvellous friend to all. Her modesty astounds me. After organising the London Reunion she has that remarkable ability to keep a low profile during the event. No speeches but a quiet thank you. Pram you are a star. May God Bless you for your kindness and generosity.
ReplyDeleteWe here in and around London are eagerly awaiting the next mini-reunion in London in late June. I do hope the spouses of our dear departed friends are able to join us.
DeleteWhat a breath of fresh air that is! I mean this dialogue between two of our batch stalwarts, Pram and Speedy. It is wonderful to read the above and it takes you back and forth in our journey during our batch and afterwards. Pram is a person I have a great admiration for and I had the good luck to be her neighbour(though sadly not walking distance) in Wembley in the UK and I remember her with great love and admiration for her talents, her good will and for the wonderful person that Pram is. I truly missed her in the later years and I appreciate every occasion our paths cross. Pram you are indeed a model member of our batch, you bring richness in the correct sense to friendships, and even though I cannot meet up with the crowd in your pool side get togethers, I time travel all the way back on the few occasions when I could. May you live a long and healthy life and may you enrich other people's lives with that unfathomable X factor you bring to events, occasions and just to a friendship. Mahendra you have chosen one who is a great friend and batch mate for this next 'candidate' for your fantastic series. Thanks, Mahendra and Pram. I truly enjoyed the conversation. All the best, from Zita
ReplyDeleteI would like to comment on another activity Pram was closely involved with. She founded a charity and built several houses and created a village for some poor people living in Wadduva. Several years ago I visited this facility together with Buddhika and was highly impressed by her commitment and generosity. Well done Pram !
ReplyDeleteSanath
Hi Prof! Well, I know you always tell me, I am Sanath! OK OK! Sanath, you have brought out into the open, an important activity of Pram's when she actually opened a charity village near Kalutara(hope I got my Geography right, someone please correct me, if not) well in this village every human being, was a person that Pram rescued from all sorts of disasters, and they were given the basics and more than basics as they had fellowship, food, friendship and fun! And their children thrived and went to school. The members of this community received medical services, and all needs were seen to. I had the luck to visit the place and spend a few hours amongst her lovely big 'family'. That's what one can call that community. This sort of work Pram is good at is what makes life worth living. I am glad we are talking about this now as it will encourage many others in our batch who are already involved in such work in other parts of the world. Zita
DeleteDear Pram and Mahen, I enjoyed "eavesdropping" on your conversation. You made some very good observations. I have been a frequent attendee at Pram's generous gatherings every time I visit Colombo. Our lives go through cycles, and there were years when we were raising children, establishing careers, and generally juggling many demands. During those periods it was not easy to keep up with friends, especially if they lived faraway. Now we are at a different stage with more time on our hands. If there is no good reason (such as poor health) to prevent us from going to a reunion, we should do it. Never mind the grey hair and the few extra pounds. Nobody cares! It is wonderful catching up with old friends. I think I missed a few early reunions, but now I give it high priority. Keeping up with friends requires requires effort. Sometimes an awkward length of time may have elapsed, but a solid friendship can be rekindled with a phone call. I agree with Pram that face to face visits are best, and that is why I plan these long visits to SL. Thank you Pram for arranging these wonderful (face to face) gatherings. Lucky, Speedy, Nihal, Rohini, Zita and all the regular Blog contributors, a big thank you for keeping it alive and providing us with a "Virtual Hangout."
ReplyDeletePram, nice to see you in this dialogue.
ReplyDeleteYou have been a ‘party girl’ as long as I have known you- dating back to the final years in our schools, when you were a great sportswoman.
In our early med school days, I remember the many outings you organized, even some death defying escapades in your Peugeot 203 !! We both paid a price studywise for the fun we had !! but have no regrets. Since then you’ve moved on to accomplish great things in the service of humanity while making a special effort to keep in touch and help whoever has come your way.
Well done Pram. May you be blessed.
Rohini, "Death defying escapades, really? What did I miss?
DeleteBunter, you’d never guess what you missed !!
DeleteUnder the bridge now !!
Paris or Kelani?
DeleteParis any day Mahen !!
Delete🤣
DeleteSrianee- The shortest sweetest comment that says it all !!
DeleteHey, that was fun reading the above exchange! Is there a prize for the shortest comments which hits one like a ton of bricks? Or it's better to say, shower of flowers. Zita
DeleteInserting on behalf of Indra Anandasabapathy:
ReplyDeleteWhat I have noticed in Pram is that she finds happiness in helping others. She is simple, friendly and most of all GIVING. That may be the X factor that Zeta was driving at? She is a very special person with these attributes.
Indra
I want to add my comments to what has been stated by many. Perhaps Chandra Swyrie Malki and myself have known Pram the longest being class mates at Metho. Pram was always full of fun . I remember her 16th Birthday party in her spacious home at Piliyandala .I can even remember that she wore a pink sari with silver trellis work on the blouse and looked stunning !
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate the effort Pram has made over the years to organise the mini batch get together's at her Hyde Park residence. It's always a delightful surprise to meet batch mates we haven't met in decades! It's also very sweet of you to include Sidath's wife in your parties as well as friends from other batches..Asoka Thenabadu , Nilani, Lalitha Mendis to name few.
Iremember how difficult it was to organise the 1st ever Reunion in SL way back in 1988 . It was J C , Sura, and myself who met fist and then we roped in Lucky ( good move ). I think you may not have been in a Sri Lanka at that time. Inspite is all our effort we could gather only 14 batch mates at Holiday Inn.
Since then we have had Reunions in 1992, 1997,2007,2012 and 2017. Swyrie Priya. Yourself and Sriyani joining the committee helped in no small was to make those Reunions so memorable.
Please do keep up your great work of organising your "Pool side " reunions to help us to keep in touch.
I am also well aware of how you reach out a helping hand to those in need I recall I had the privilege of being of a little help when your protégé s needed medical attention.
A big thank you Pram and may God shower His Blessings on you. Suri
bathe