A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says 'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.' The bartender says 'Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me.'
As the woman finishes her drink the woman to her right says 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.' The old woman says 'Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.' 'Coming up' says the bartender .
As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says 'I would like to buy you one, too.' The old woman says 'Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.' 'Coming right up' the bartender says.
As he gives her the drink, he says
'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?' The old woman replies 'Sonny, when you're my age, You've learned how to hold your liquor... holding your water however, is a whole other issue.'
'OLD' IS WHEN....
Your sweetie says 'Let's go upstairs and make love' And you answer: 'Pick one, I can't do both!'
'OLD' IS WHEN... Your friends compliment you On your new alligator shoes And you're barefoot!
'OLD' IS WHEN... A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy .... And your pacemaker opens the garage door!
'OLD' IS WHEN.... You don't care where your spouse goes .. Just as long as you don't have to go along.
'OLD' IS WHEN... You are cautioned to slow down By the doctor instead of by the police
'OLD' IS WHEN... 'Getting lucky' means you find your car .. In the parking lot.
'OLD' IS WHEN... An 'all nighter' means not getting up To use the bathroom.
AND 'OLD' IS WHEN..... You are not sure these are jokes!
I like them!
ReplyDeleteOld is when you make an ID ten T error with your computer. What? Just write it down and you will know! .................ID10T
Sriani... keep it up. Here a few more to ponder??
ReplyDeleteOLD.....like a Malt Whiskey that matures with age.... best consumed NEAT--without anything "on" it..
OLD...is when her husband is unable to "rise" "IN" or OUT of bed in the morning!!
OLD ...is when your wife sleeps in the spare room because of your snoring.
OLD ... is when your wife sleeps in the spare room because she has lost all her "inclinations".
OLD..... is when your wife realises that your "volume" has reduced and she has less to clean up!!
Razaque.