My tribute to Mangalam “Mangy” Sabaratnam Krishnadasan
Surangani Fernando (nee Abeysuriya)
I write this with immense grief and a sense of irreplaceable loss as I have lost one of my closest friends. Mangalam, or Mangy as I call her, was very close to me, and I regard her as my best friend. She was a dear friend of mine over the years, always there for me through thick and thin. I still find it hard to imagine a world without Mangy, a lovely, kind, generous and loyal friend.
In Medical school, Mangy, myself, and Kamali Nimalasuriya, also sadly no more, studied together.
When romance came our way, JC and I, Mangy and Krishna became a special foursome, and we spent such happy hours together. They will always remain a treasured memory.
After graduation, JC and I decided to get married, and Mangy was my chief bridesmaid.
(I
enclose a photo from my wedding showing Mangy second and me third from the left).
During all these years, my friendship grew and continued with Mangy, and we met many a time during her spells in SL.
Even in this current year, 2022, she and I continued our long-standing conversations, and I knew all details about my dear friend’s life.
Some years ago, she left her family and came to India to the Ashram of Sai Baba. But unfortunately, she had a terrible time there. She was left alone, and a family upheaval arose.
Her marriage sadly broke up, and I was her closest confidant during this stressful and unhappy time. She valued my support as the poor girl was so distraught.
She returned to SL for a short spell, did some voluntary service for a couple of months in SL, and finally returned to the US to live near one of her brothers.
As Bunter (Srianee) said in her post, she had been living in Tucson, Arizona, near her younger son Ravi, for the last five years. She had some health problems for some time, and when they became more severe, and various interventions were offered to her, Mangalam chose hospice care. Her daughter Anusha and younger son Ravi were with her when she died. According to a text sent out by her sister, they were playing the Gayatri Mantra.
Mangy my dear friend, I miss you so much, and I sincerely hope that you
finally found the Peace you were looking for and so richly deserve.
Your friend forever,
Sura
Dear Sura,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your memories of Mangalam. I believe you were were one of the few batch mates with whom she kept in close contact. My contact with her was rather sporadic and indirect (through her sons). Mangy went through a very tough time during the past few years, and I am certain your friendship meant a lot to her.
I know this is a huge loss for you, Sura. Unfortunately, as we get older we have to brace ourselves for such losses. We also need to support each other when times are hard, as you and Mangy did for each other.
I did write to her children and this is what her daughter wrote:
"Amma's passing happened in the best way for her and us possible. She went peacefully and without pain with strong prayers and us nearby. She told us all what she wanted before so made it easy for us to make the right decisions at the time. We know she is at peace now and wasn’t for many years."
Perhaps it will give you some comfort. (I will share their contact information with you privately via email.)
Sura and Srianee
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the tributes. It is so sad to hear of the loss of another of our valued friends from our batch. I remember Mangalam as a pretty girl who graced our batch and our lives during those busy times in the Faculty. I cannot remember her at the London reunion and sadly we never met after those final goodbyes in 1967.
I am saddened to hear of her troubles in her final few years but assume Mangalam had a good life overall.
I send her close family my condolences at this time of grief.
May she find eternal peace
Nihal D Amerasekera
Nihal, thank you for joining in and adding some of your memories to this tribute. I think I will share the link to the blog with her children. I believe they will find some comfort in reading our condolences.
ReplyDeleteI remember her as a very attractive girl with a wonderful warm personality. She had a gorgeous figure and carried herself elegantly. Sadly, I lost contact over the years although news about her reached me from time to time. I can see that it was particluarly hard for Sura as she was so close to her. This is life... nothing is permanent.
ReplyDeleteFROM DHUSHY VEDAVANAM
ReplyDeleteMahendra I would like to express my Deepest Sympathies to the family of your departed colleague Mangalam Sabaratnam.
I was very touched by Sura Fernando’s moving tribute about her dear friend.
Also Srianee’s comforting words.
May she attain Moksha.
Dhushy
Maagala brought to my notice that your friend Mangalam has passed away. Our deepest sympathies.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry that I am not in a fit condition to write a longer comment as I am sick myself.
Lucky