Remembrance of Our Mates

It is almost an year since Priya passed-on and I thought that I would pen a few words in remembrance of this sad event. I promised her dear husband Chula to do so at the time when I sent him our condolences. Unfortunately, family health issues overtook me during the period straddling 2014-15 and I was unable to do so. This would be an appropriate time to say those few words at the First Anniversary of her passing on and at the same stroke of my pen to remember other mates who have passed-on. Also recently our Zita after her meeting with Malkanthi in London  made a comment to a reply by me in our Blog that it was fortunate that I met Priya for the last time in 2007!! It was fortunate indeed that I met up with all those mates of mine  at the time.

We first met at Med School in 1962 when we were 'wide eyed freshers'  although I had some insight to Uni. life in the preceding year in the 6-Months !st MB Course. Priya and I knew each other, but rarely did we chat with each other. When we met in passing it was just an exchange of greetings dependent on the time of day. Do not get me wrong, I am NO misogynist.!! This association with Priya now reminds me of Scottish Folk / Country Dancing where the dancers change partners in the process of dancing say "Hello" to the new partner and "Good- bye"  to the former!!! So it was a case of "Hello --- Good - Bye" in our case and that was pretty much all we said to each other in all those years @{ Med School and we went our own ways after graduation. That was till about 3 decades later when our paths crossed again during the 35th Reunion at Hikkaduwa 1997!!!  

It was when we embarked into the busses in Colombo that our paths crossed & 'friendship' rekindled. I got into the bus and as fate had it, there was an aisle seat available and I sat there next to Priya. We instantly recognised each other at this chance meeting and after usual pleasantries of our batch--  of hugs, she said "Razaque, you look well but for some grey hairs on the side- burns" At first I was taken aback that she knew my name without any prompting & then I replied "You too look the same Priya, but for a bit of greying -that must be must be 'high-lights'.... eh" She replied "NO"!!--- quite firmly and said "They are real. It looks as only you & I are growing old GRACEFULLY and WELCOME TO  VANITY FAIR" We had hearty laugh and continued our journey to Hikkaduwa talking about our "spouses / spices" and our kids' achievements and antics in school and outwith school. That was a chance meeting with Priya after about three decades following those glorious years as a Med Students!!.After the Reunion we parted company and lost touch for another decade. In the interim, I had taken early retirement from the NHS and gone to New Zealand as Transfusion Medicine Specialist & Director at NZBS, Auckland. I was in touch only with Luckey of our batch as it was at the beginning of  the 'Internet explosion'.!! I returned to UK in 2006 after about a 7-year stint in NZ. It was time again for the next Reunion. This was the time I came into contact again with Priya via email as she was a major player on the Organizing Committee of the 2007 Reunion at Cinnamon Lodge. We met again at this reunion and "took-off where we left off".

We all had a great time @ Cinnamon Lodge meeting up with a host of mates I had not met for decades!! It was the occasion that we met Chula, Priya,s husband for the first time and my wife commented later --"What a wonderful couple they are". 

Following this Reunion  Priya and I were in e-mail contact as a way to communicate news. Then in 2009 my wife &  I had to undergo very major Cardiac Surgery and there was a great sense of family un-certainty & "End is Nigh" feeling that was in prevalence in the mood of the family at that time. The reality was that the family could have lost both their parents in the course of 10-weeks!!! That would have been a tragedy by any standards!! Somehow we managed to ride out the 'hurricane' and come out of it with somewhat minimal  consequences. Shortly after this was the preparations for the 2012 Reunion when Priya as one of the Organising Committee was in touch with me promoting the event. I informed that we would not be able attend this landmark event as much as we would have liked to, as we were recovering from the afore mentioned health issues. She was extremely supportive and it was at this juncture that she disclosed the predicament that she was in!!. Having had experience in treating patients in my speciality with similar medications that she was on, I was very well aware of the side effects that  I would not wish on even my worst enemies of which I have none!! As we both knew the seriousness of the situation, the only thing I could do was to reciprocate her kindness she accorded me and support her as much as I could. I was well aware of the mood that may have prevailed in the Priya-Chula household. It was this mutual understanding of our circumstances that led us to be more as 'Soulmates' in addition of our friendship as Batchmates!!.

She sent me some photos of the 2012-Reunion and in one she identified her as " the third from left WITH GREY HAIRS" ---- she must have written that with her usual CHUCKLES or maybe even CHORTLES?? I very much regret that I was unable to attend this occasion to meet her for the last time!!

At this juncture I wish to note that after the announcements of Obituaries in the Blog there is a flood of messages of out-pouring of grief from our mates who just 'come out of the woodwork' and a few days later all go into their 'dormant domain' only to reappear to at the next bereavement announcement!!!!. As such I wish to think of a few of my mates and colleagues who have departed  at this point. Firstly, Sunna de Silva a close friend and batchmate, then a classmate,schoolmate & latterly a batchmate in Bernard Randeniya, with whom I did a lot of studies together at school and latterly along with ND (still alive,'active and well) in Wattala!!! I was very close to Russell Paul from our 6-month Course days when he use to pick me up from home in Wattala and go Gampaha at the invitation of Siri Waidyaratne from the 6-months batch (now in a GP in NZ), along with a number of other mates to spend the day at the Botanic Gardens & visited St.Jude Church-- for the Desperates !!!. Of course I cannot forget the recently departed Malik Jaimon, a batch mate, member of the same community and latterly a relative by marriage when I married his cousin, Farina .I have not forgotten the other members of our '62-Batch such as Dawn, Sidath, Michael Satchi, Rajalaxshmi Sivaguru, 'Smiler' Sivakumar, Punsiri, BL & Lucien Perera,whom my last fond memory awas him breaking into song on the return trip from Cinnamon Lodge  and not the least that impish Veda. amongst all the other departed mates. I know I have missed out on some of my departed colleagues -- I am sorry my memory has let me down -- my apologies. Also there are three of my junior batch mates in Ananda Cooray who was also my class & school mate, Ananda Perera (latterly a Brig. Gen. in the SL Army Medical Corp) & Jayasinghe (a childhood Polio victim) -both schoolmates.

 We should at least occasionally pause a moment in their memory of the great times we had in those few years together at School & Med School.  

 May they all attain Nirvarna / Heaven /Jannah according to whatever religious persuasions they belonged to. In any case, if the above destinations are not "available" they will am sure be having a jolly good time in ETERNAL ELYSIUM, toasting us the LIVING of this uncertain WORLD of OURS --to join them in the JOLLIFICATIONS!!!!. 

RAZAQUE AHAMAT

Blog Administrator's note: Today's Sunday Times (published in Sri Lanka) carries two appreciations. One on Priya by her sisters (Rani, Rohini and Srini) and another on Vedavanam by our own ND Amerasekera.

http://www.sundaytimes.lk/151004/plus/appreciations-2-166614.html

The appreciation on Priya appears in today's Sunday Island as well.