REMEMBRANCE DAY 2022. SIVAKUMAR VEDAVANAM

Dr Sivakumar Vedavanam  Passed away on 01.07.2015

Med Fac sig book 1962, Passport 1975 and more recent

“Veda” as we called him, passed away nearly 7 years ago, although it is hard to believe that so much time has elapsed. He was the son of Murugesu, a stationmaster from Mavidapuram and Nesamani, a housewife from Thunavi, Vaddukoddai. As his son describes him, “at heart, he remained a Jaffna man”.

His wife Dhushyanthi whom he married in 1975, has kept in touch with his Batch colleagues and is a regular attender of our mini-reunions in London. She is a wonderful and sensitive person. It has become a special feature in our batch that so many spouses maintain contact with us.

Veda’s children were touched by so many wonderful messages that have appeared in our Blog from the time of his passing away and on Remembrance Days.

Dhushy,  Veda, Krishni & Tharan

They sent this message and I got their permission to post it. Dhushy very kindly sent a collection of family photos showing how Veda the singleton became a devoted husband and then an exceptional father and finally a doting grandfather.

After the message from his son Tharan and daughter Krishni, both doctors, I have added some quotes from colleagues which reveal the Man as he was, a good citizen, a caring Doctor, a loving and devoted husband, a dutiful father by example and a doting grandfather with a personality described by many with words such as cheeky, smiley, impish, boyish, talkative, cheerful, principled and jovial and generous.

Message from his son Sivatharan (Tharan) and daughter Krishnaveni (Krishni )

Our father was incredibly humble and modest and would be so honoured by the fact that you took the trouble to provide a recollection for the blog. It was wonderful to read your reminiscences, of our father and of other peers in your year. Your description of his “modesty, classless friendship and lavish hospitality” certainly chimes with our own memories of Appa. We’ve included a small recollection below, as Amma thought others from your batch might find it of interest. 

Daughter's Family including Krsihni's mother-in-law

Appa was born in Jaffna Town, in the north of Sri Lanka. Although he went on to university in the capital, leaving his home town and eventually the country of his birth, he still retained the homely values of the region of his birth, which he used to inform his own parenting and duties of a spouse and son – the importance of familial ties and the need for hard work, infused with tolerance, patience and adaptability. He cared for his mother, our grandmother, throughout much of the latter part of her life, as she was widowed when he was at university. He did this with no demur, and those who knew them both described the endless care he would take with her, bathing her himself when she became too frail to care for herself without help. He married our mother, Dhushyanthi, in 1975. My mother’s father was a well-known and formidable character. However, despite his eminent status, he was impressed by, and greatly respected, our father’s gentleness and kindness.

Appa sacrificed huge amounts in order to provide his family with whatever we needed, and we never felt in want of anything, emotionally or materially.

Dhushy and Veda with grandkds

He instilled in us the importance of trying one’s best in any situation and was immensely proud of our own academic and career achievements. However, he also ensured that we recognised that all these achievements were nothing without a loving and secure family environment. Prior to his death, he was delighted to have 4 grandchildren: Saranya(14), Tamara (8), (Krishna's), Seetha(9)and Rayan(7) (Tharan’s), whom he doted on.
Although Appa supported us throughout our lives, he was never prescriptive and allowed us to seek our own course in life. His values infuse our lives even now, as his legacy lives on in our children. He is dearly missed and remains alive in our hearts and memories.
Thanks for taking the time to remember those of your batchmates who are no more, and also including their families. We have loved looking at the entries on the blog you set up to celebrate the Colombo med grads of 1962, and are sure it is a source of comfort to the families of those who have left this mortal coil.

A random selection of comments on Veda from colleagues on our Blog

Srianee Dias: His friendly, cheerful personality.

Nihal Amerasekera:  I got to know “Veda” when we worked together in the Central Blood Bank in Colombo. He was a thoughtful and dedicated doctor. He showed tremendous kindness to the Public Health Inspectors, attendants and labourers who were part of our team. His modesty, classless friendship and lavish hospitality stood out.   Veda had a philosophical outlook on life accepting its ups and downs with good grace. He was a helpful and loyal friend and we were close.  Veda had a heart of gold and treated his family and friends with great reverence and affection. He was a truly remarkable person. Adios amigo. 

DSC Attale: I last met Vedavanam at Bobby Somasunderam’s funeral. He was the same energetic talkative Veda,  I knew before,  sad I lost contact with for the last two years.

Bandula Jayasekera: pleasant, friendly and innocently jovial, with a smiley face-  ALWAYS!

Rohini Anandappa: I remember Vedavanam as a jovial nice guy.

Sanath de Tissera: Veda I remember him as a friendly chap always with a smile and mixed with all.

Kumar Gunawardena: I remember him as a cheerful guy with a cheeky grin most of the time.

Razaque Ahamath: Veda was a guy one cannot forget -- for his cheek, impish and boyish behaviour that was at times irritating and irksome but nobody took any offence as it was all good-natured and said with a smile and with no insult, no malice nor venom.
All I can say now is "inna illahi, wa inna lillahi rojoon" -- in Arabic meaning "To God he belongs, to God he returns"

Nihal Amerasekera: His cheeky grin and casual manner are memories for us all. He accepted life with good grace and was great company and a wonderful friend. I will always remember him as an honest and dignified person. He had a strong sense of right and wrong. Veda had a heart of gold and helped many who came into contact with him. He spoke of his friends for their past loyalties and said nothing about his enemies – typical of a man with a large heart, a fine brain, and a broad and generous spirit.

Appu Sumathipala: I shared several jokes with him during our medical student days. We had amicable chats, quite often, and I often thought of calling him "Thambi"(younger brother in Tamil).

Zita Perera Subasinghe: He does sound like a real 'Human Being'. We need many more of them in this world.

Mahendra Gonsalkorale: It reinforced my feeling that I really missed associating with a really special person after losing contact.

Lucky Abeyagunawardene: Veda was a particularly good friend of mine some years ago. For a short period of three months in 1974, I shared with him his room at Regent House when he was attached to the Central Blood Bank.

I shall end this post with a quote by George Eliot which I used in my recent Remembrance Day post

“Our dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them”

- Posted by Mahendra Gonsalkorale -