Monday, August 22, 2016
Something lighthearted while sipping a jeroboam of wine.
Sent in by Razaque Ahamat
All of you may have at some point experienced the bloody nuisance calls known as " Cold Callers".
Here are a few that we had to deal with!!
1.Telephone rang and my wife picked it up and the caller said "Can I speak to Dr.Ahamat"
She replied "He does not live here any more, he has left me"...... I laughed
Caller "who was that laughing? She replied " Oh,That's my toy boy" and put the phone down!!
2..Another time I picked the phone & the caller said "Can I speak to Mrs. Ahamat?"
I replied " Which one, there are SEVEN here. I am a Muslim you know"
Caller " You must be very busy"
Reply "Are you deaf or what? Can't you hear me out of breath & panting"
Got cut off.
3.I picked up the phone.
Caller " Good Day, Sir...... nice and warm today!"
Replied " What do you want?"
Caller " Can I speak to Mrs. Ahamat, please?"
When being polite, one cannot be rude!!
Reply " Oh, being a nice day, she is out GRAZING"
Silly bugger said "When will she be back?"
Replied " At noon, that will be her MILKING TIME!!"
Got cut off.
4. This one is not the 'bloody cold callers'.
I had been very constipated for a few days and had an awful time trying
to deposit it with a lot of 'pushing' & panting. It was very painful indeed.
Coming out of the loo I told my wife "Now I can appreciate what you guys
may be experiencing at child birth"" She glanced at me & grinned!!
Then I went into the garden as usual and did a lot of digging and "did" my back.
Came indoors holding the small of my back and told my wife if she would please
give me a 'rub down' and held the tube of 'Feldene'?????
She said very sternly " You must be joking"!!!
She thought I wanted some medication to my "AHH.. SOUL" applied!!!
I said it was only ' a little bit higher'......to her hilarity!!
She did a grand job of it later anyway... cannot complain.