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Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Baptist Bra - Sent in by Sriani (Dissanayake) Basnayake

Baptist Bra
 
A man walked into the women's department of Macy's in New York City.

He told the saleslady, "I would like a Baptist bra for my wife, size 36B."
With a quizzical look, the saleslady asked, "What kind of bra?"

  He repeated, "A Baptist bra. She said to tell you that she wanted a
  Baptist bra and that you would know what she wanted."
  "Ah, now I remember." said the saleslady, "We don't get as many requests
  for them as we used to. Most of our customers lately want the Catholic bra
  or the Salvation Army bra, or the Presbyterian type."

  Confused and a little flustered, the man asked, "So what are the differences?"
  The lady responded, "Well, it's really quite simple. The catholic type
  supports the masses, the Salvation Army lifts up the fallen, and the
  Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright."
  He mused at that for a moment and then asked, "So, what is the Baptist type for?"
  "They," she replied, "make mountains out of molehills".

And, if you need more bra info - here's some more:
   Have you ever wondered why bras are lettered A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G,
  & H and how the letters are actually used to define bra sizes?
  Well, if you've ever wondered, but couldn't figure it out, here's the code:

   A. Almost Boobs
   B. Barely Boobs
   C. Can't complain
   D. Dang!
   DD. Double Dang!
   E. Enormous
   F. Fake
   G. Get a reduction
   H. HELP ME, I'VE FALLEN AND CAN'T GET UP
 
 
..CODE FOR SEX
A mother had three daughters and, on their wedding, she tells each one  to write back about their married life. To avoid possible embarrassment  to their new husbands by openly discussing their love lives, the mother  and daughters agree to using newspaper advertisements as a "code" to let  the mother know how their love lives are going.
 
The first one gets  married and the second day the letter arrives with a single message,
simply: "MAXWELL COFFEE HOUSE". Mother got the newspaper and checked the
Maxwell Coffee House advertisement, and it says: "Satisfaction to the  last drop..."
 So, Mother is happy.
 
Then the second daughter gets married. After a  week, there was a message that reads: "ROTHMAN'S MATTRESSES". So, the  Mother looks at the Rothman's Mattresses ad, and it says: "FULL SIZE,  KING SIZE". And Mother is happy.
 
Then it was the third one's wedding. Mother was anxious. After four  weeks came the message: "BRITISH AIRWAYS". And mother looks into the  British Airways ad, but this time she fainted. The ad reads: "THREE  TIMES A DAY, SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, BOTH WAYS."

4 comments:

  1. Sriani

    Thank you for those jokes to wake us up!!. A bit of titillation never goes amiss. It uplifts the soul and adds fuel to the fire. I have been proved right in thinking British Airways provides the best service.
    ND

    ReplyDelete
  2. Super jokes! Keep them coming Sriani.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Give me a sense of humor, Lord.
    Give me the ability to understand a clean joke,
    To get some humor out of life,
    And to pass it on to other folks.
    Sriani

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sriani, Your suggestion for a jokes category is turning out to be lots of fun-Thankyou
    Thanks also to Lucky for making all this possible.
    Lucky I haven't seen you complete your joke about the Foramen Magnum-

    ReplyDelete